Monday, February 23, 2009

I'm a Hero

So one of my favorite blogs is Dave2.  He is funny and witty and insightful and I stalk his blog all of the time.  Plus he has a Bad Monkey and draws some pretty hilarious cartoons.  So I totally ripped off his post this last Saturday to create my own Super Hero.

Behold... the awesomeness that is the ADW.  I think that is going to stand for Advanced Douchebag Whacker.  Or maybe Amazing Dildo Wielder.  Or even Astounding Dipshit Wadledoodler.  The last one was lame.  Sorry.  I am drained.

I am bad ass.  Do you see my whip?  And my angel wings?  And the skin tight outfit that totally wouldn't fit me in real life?  But in real life I would more likely have devil horns so I am taking creative license to do whatever the fuck I want.  So there.

Don't mess with me or I will beat your ass.  I will slash you with my whip and then I will pour vinegar on your wounds and then beat a cool breeze down on you with my wings which will make it burn even worse.  Then I will crush you with my thighs.  Oops.  I am confusing Super Hero with James Bond vixen.

Oh snap!  Wouldn't a program that allows you to create your own Bond character be totally great?  Holy shit.  Someone needs to get on that STAT!  Not me because you know, completely not creative.... but someone please create that application.

Now I have the urge to make my own Bond Girl.  Actually vixen.  They are always cooler than the Bond Girls.  Like Grace Jones.  What a totally kick as bitch she was in "A View to Kill."  

OK.  I really need to go get ready for a busy day. 

Peace out fuckers!


Avitable said...

You'd be a bad ass Bond girl.

nudeman40 said...

ADW(awsomly developed woman) you look awsomly hot in that outfit. It needs some peek-a-boo holes in it though