Sunday, January 31, 2010

Finding My Happy Again


I have vacillated about writing this past year. It's not that I don't love writing, I do. It's more that I have been struggling with personal issues for so long that I just let that love wither and wilt.

But I am really going to try to write. I am not going to give myself rules about writing. I am not going to say that I will post at least three times a week, or that I will write in my notebook every night. I think that is just setting myself up for failur
e. And how does one really fail at something like writing? My words co
me from the heart. They have never been premeditated for laughter or comments or praise or approval. NEVER
EVER. My words have been a very simple expression of myself. I am at my best when I just let things flow straight from my heart or gall bladder or axillary or wherever those words come from.

But I feel like I have gotten some of my happiness back
again. And happiness truly does come from within. Sure there have been people who have contributed to my happiness. Friends, family and lov
ed ones. But I am going to take credit for most of this. Because I could have easily let myself wither up and die... but I didn't. I fought. And I am still fighting. Because? That is who I am. I am a fighter. Sometimes the fight gets me down and leaves me weary and my heart is troubled. But at the end of the day, when I lay my head on my pillows at night, I know who I am inside. And I like myself.

Of course, spending the last week of January on
Maui helped me get back to center. So here are a few pictures of a place that I have ABSOLUTELY fallen in love with. I would go back in a heartbeat.

Sunrise at Mt. Haleakala


My mom and I at dinner

Sunrise over the water at the Lava Flow
Finally, I would like to thank my mom. She had some wonderful words of wisdom for me while we were in Maui together. She also gave me a journal at the end of our trip and this is what she wrote inside of it:

"Dear ADW,

Thank you for a wonderful vacation. This is for your writing - I love your stories.
Forever.
Love,
Mom
Jan 2010"

Thanks mom!!!

6 comments:

Hilly said...

I like a happy ADW, oh yes I do!

ADW said...

Hilly - I like her too. And I LOVE the hawt picture. Soooo sexy.

sybil law said...

I really, really want to go to Maui, too! WAH!
Good for you, finding your happy. It was just waiting for you to reclaim it.

Avitable said...

That is awesome that your mom gave you a journal. And I'm glad you were able to get away and relax a bit.

ADW said...

Sybil - OMG bitch. How you been????

Adam - Thanks. We both deserve it. Wish I was closer to you geographically.

Nick Cage Revealed said...

Maui is my favorite place. I have been there many times and I will go again. So happy you have discovered Maui.