A Bullet Post

I am off to Virginia Beach for a quick getaway. I have a brother-in-law who just made CHIEF in the Navy and his ceremony is coming up, so we are all getting together to celebrate. I come from a long line of military people and this is an important milestone in his life, so we all wanted to get together and toast him on his accomplishment. Over and over and over again. While I am gone, I will leave you with some thoughts, observations and occurrences:

• It really sucks when you pee in the shower and realize that it isn't draining.


• It sucks even harder when it is at a hotel.


• I can not stand pretentious people. I am not one and it's a shade of ugly that doesn't look good on anybody.


• I have a new favorite wine: Folie A Deux Menage A Trois. It's a Red Wine Meritage (I had to look it up, but it's a blend of Cab, Merlot and Red Zin). Yummy goodness. At $10.00 a bottle at Costco, how can you go wrong?


• It may not be such a good idea to drink two bottles of your new favorite wine while playing poker with people from your office. At your office. Drinking. With your boss. Two days before your review. Just sayin'.


• You can make a grown man spit out his drink when he is working the concession stand at a kid's soccer game and you go up to order a coffee. How? Well, he asks you if he can help you and you reply by saying: "only if you have a stomach pump and an IV bag."


• I saw ManHo Cho when I went out to breakfast late Friday Night/Early Saturday morning. He introduced me to Red Lobster Boy of the huge cock and then proceeded to ask my opinion of his outfit. In front of the VERY crowded restaurant. He was wearing a wife beater and assless jeans. I can't make this shit up people. I thought the straightlaced folks I was with were going to start puking up their eggs and pancakes right then and there.


• I thought it was hilarious and continued to egg him on. We fawned over each other and I kept making him pull up his shirt to show me the back of his pants. Well, it was really his ass crack. And most of his ass. He has a mighty fine ass.


• I enjoy making other people slightly uncomfortable.


• I took away Mr. ADW's mancard when he asked me what NT stood for during a football game. I snorted and rolled my eyes and said: "Nose Tackle." He felt like a dillhole. I felt good.


• The Buckeyes won.


• The evil, rabies infested mutts from one state over won too. Whatever. Their season was over before it ever started.


• I love football.


• I love hockey.


• I love basketball and boxing and I even like Baseball.


• I watch ESPN to catch the highlights and listen to SportsTalk Radio all day long


• I have attended a Jim Rome tour stop.


• Most people think that the previous 5 comments are weird when associated with me. I just like sports.


• Ipod earbuds DO NOT fit in my ears. I have freakishly small ears. I guess that's good if I ever hook up with someone who has a Hobbit Dick.


• My one dog is very overweight. I tried to take her running this weekend. We went about an eighth of a mile before she shit in someone else's yard. It was very hot and not completely solid. I contemplated leaving it there, but the good angel won out. I only let her give her opinions on Sundays.

That's all I've got!!! See you soon!